Anger

I can't do this anymore 

I can't do this anymore

And this thing that I can't do,

I just keep doing it

And doing it

And fucking doing it.

Just stop. 

Stop it.

This moment of 

Pacing back and forth

Breathing hard,

Harder to breathe 

Soon collapsing 

Convulsing.

Panic strikes me 

Like a slave being 

Beaten by his master. 

What the fuck am I doing? 

What am I thinking!

Staring at this movie,

Alone in the room,

Photos of promise

But the smell of regret

And the rape that once 

Consumed me.

I am scared.

Scared of myself.

I am scared of

The ones that don't understand me or

don't like me,

The ones that are tired of me or 

are just fed up with me,

The ones that are confused about me or

Believe me to be ignorant,

The ones that don't know what I am or

why I do the things that I do. 

Me.

Fuck me.

Fuck my life.

I can't do this anymore.

I can't so this anymore.

So, I'm done. 

This moment,

My thoughts and feelings 

My addtions and divisions 

The subtraction of pieces 

Of this life.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry to everyone.

Goodbye, my sweet.

It was you.

Everyone. 

But now it's 

Me.

No one.